BUY ONE GET ONE FOR A PENNY

“The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly; it is dearness only that gives everything its value. I love the man that can smile in trouble, that can gather strength from distress and grow brave by reflection. ‘Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles unto death.”–Thomas Paine

I was at dinner a few nights ago with a girlfriend, when the topic of which we were talking prompted her to share a portion of the above quote–”what we obtain too cheaply, we esteem too lightly.”  That quote has been rolling around in my head since the moment I repeated it back to her at the dinner table.  And it seemed to pop up (like that arcade game where you pound the mole heads with the mallet) into my consciousness several times this week.

You see, I have been seeking permanent full time employment for almost a year now.  I have been dealing with paying my mortgage, my bills, keeping food on the table and gas in my car, on a very limited budget.  There have been “almost” job offers, but NOTHING definitive yet!  This week I have jumped through so many hoops I feel I am ready for the circus.  But then, I guess life IS a circus!

So, this morning, in the wee hours, in the glow of the LED light from my iPhone, I google-searched (ok, let’s just plug every company I possibly can in this post!) the quote and found the expanded version above.  It is even more enlightening when expanded.

What is Thomas Paine saying but that when we struggle to finally obtain something that we truly desire with wholeheartedness, the triumph, the success, is even more glorious than we can expect.  Does not Paul speak of God being able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we could ask or think in his letter to the Ephesians? (Eph 3:20)  Are we not taught that a man is worthy of his hire, that hard work is rewarded, that there is a payoff for our labor?

I can’t really relate to the reference to not esteeming what is obtained cheaply because I have always held even a penny to have great value.  I think I took care of anything I purchased even if I paid just a dollar for it.  My “work” career started as a babysitter at 50 cents per hour.  I considered every penny hard-earned (try being a 10 year old asked to babysit a newborn into the wee hours of the morning when young captains and their wives were attending parties at the Officer’s Club).

My mother was a very frugal woman (I wouldn’t label her “cheap”; she was truly FRUGAL and could make a box of Kraft Mac & Cheese feed a family of six with left overs!).  As kids, we got at the beginning of every school year, one pair of shoes.  Some clothes were designated as “school attire”, others were “Sunday church clothes”, and usually the well worn, hand-me-downs would go as “play clothes”.

My ten year old idea of how to use babysitting money included candy (which I wasn’t really fond of) or comic books, or doll clothes, but it wasn’t until I was pre-teen or older that my earnings as a babysitter became lucrative.  It is ALL ABOUT THE SHOES, BABY.  When I decided one pair of shoes was not adequate for my wardrobe, I was told I could use “my” money for anything I wanted (which was always the case).

When on those family shoe shopping trips, if I would see a pair of shoes I wanted, I would calculate how many hours I would have to work to earn enough to purchase them.  If I didn’t have that amount immediately available, I would simply step up on the offers to babysit.  Over the years my rates crept up to where I was making $1 an hour and sitting several nights a week.  Hey, you played with them, put them to bed, then read their books (shhh! The Joy of Sex, The Happy Hooker, etc– things I wasn’t going to find at my house!) , listened to their albums (I got turned on to Barbara Streisand and Cat Stevens), and did homework.  Easy money…well, after they actually went to sleep!

I bring all this up to make THE point.  I knew how to evaluate my labor and turn it into the things I desired.  And because I had to put out effort, I took great care with everything I purchased.  I have shoes (and clothes and bags and accessories) in my closet today that are decades old (I also know how to pick non-trendy things that last way beyond one or even two seasons).  Paine said, “Tis the dearness only that give everything its value.” I still value a good bargain and a great pair of shoes.

I don’t know how much smiling I have done but I can say I have gathered strength from the distress and have grown brave through lots and lots of reflection (and crying, and wailing like the Israeli wailing women, and even some object throwing).  There have been times when my mind has shrunk back and I have spent the day in bed or simply in my pajamas reading or watching favorite movies.  But, all in all, my heart has remained firm and my conduct remains approved by my conscience (one of my stand firm verses is “The faith that you have, have as your own conviction before God” from the Book of Romans).  I will get up and continue the pursuit with my principles in tack.

And you will probably hear the shout “HALLELUJAH” around the world when I finally accept MY well-earned J.O.B!  And I will be damn happy to have one!

A FORK IN THE ROAD

I not talking about an eating utensil in the road. I am talking about when you come upon a place in your life’s journey where you must make a choice to go one direction or another. You know, a fork in the road.

It occurred to me this morning that there is a particular fork in the road that each of us probably stumbles upon on a daily basis. It probably makes for some pretty interesting aerial views of our journeys through this life. The fork I speak of is the one with the signs CAN and CAN’T.

Henry Ford is the one who is quoted as saying,

“If you think you CAN and if you think you CAN’T, you are right.”

How many times a day do each of us face the question, “Can I do this?” How many times do we answer, “I Can”? How many other times do we answer, “I Can’t”? How many times do we say, “I can” and then wish we had said, “I can’t” and visa versa?

How many of us ever take the time to stop and give pause and consider how powerful our ability to think actually is? God thought, then said, and there was. Michelangelo di Lodovico Buonarroti Simoni thought and there was his famous David. Bill Gates thought and there was Microsoft. You might think, and there will be this fabulous dessert on your dinner table tonight.

How many split second judgments about our abilities must we make in order to effectively choose which direction to go? The Apostle Paul wrote, “I CAN do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”–Phillipians 4:13 He didn’t say “some things…maybe a few things”. Paul had come to an understanding that anything was possible in relationship to God.

He had been one of the most powerful and outspoken opponents of the followers of Jesus. He found himself on the road to Damascus when he had a personal encounter with God that changed the entire direction of his life…a fork in the road, so to speak. He had a choice put upon him that the vast majority of us never get. But then I don’t imagine that many of the rest of us have been struck blind by The Light and spoken to directly by God. He was chosen by God for his path.

The vast majority of us will choose for ourselves. And there are a myriad of possibilities in life when we choose to think “Yes, I can”. When we know that God is vested in the success of our lives, we can say “yes” to things that maybe don’t make sense to others, or maybe seem a bit out of our ordinary or out of our comfort zones. We can also say “I can’t” and that is OK because it is also very possible that God will put us through things that will show us quite the contrary. God is in the “yes I can” business.

How many people on this planet are simply stumbling through life, falling on the roads, tripping in the sand, knocking into their fellow travelers with little or no thought to what they are doing or how what they are doing is affecting others on the road. And how many are living with a true sense of purpose and direction, giving thoughtful consideration as to which fork in the road is the right one at this time? How many flip a coin and simply ease on down the road?

I have chosen the “Can’t” road before and suffered the consequences; like watching others enjoy the benefits of having said “I can” or missing an opportunity that would have propelled me further up the road (kind of like drawing an Advance to Go card in a monopoly game). If you choose enough “Can’t” forks in the road, you will lose all sense of value in this life. You will view yourself as a failure, a reject, someone so flawed as to be useless to anyone.

And yet the “Can’t” fork in the road is not a hopeless path because God is aware of both the road and those who are on it. What He has made is of value to Him even if it isn’t recognized. It is declared in scripture that God is at work in each of us to will and to work for His good pleasure. Our success pleases God. Like I said, He is in the “Yes I can” business even if you are on the “no I can’t” road. All roads lead to Him anyway.

Just be mindful of your path and believe in your abilities to complete that which you put your mind to do. As you think, so you are, and if you think you can, you are right. And when you come to that fork in the road, choose the CAN side a little more often than the CAN’T. You might be pleasantly surprised at how talented you really are and how greatly God has gifted you.

FEELINGS…

I recently read a comment that said “feelings are real but not always accurate”.   It seems it is easy for us to get caught up in or carried away by our feelings and the feelings of those around us.  Feelings generate an energy that is sometimes pleasant and other times scary as hell.

Yesterday I got a “call” from a friend who is suffering some deep emotional pain resulting from the shattering of her life as she has known it to be.  I was having a rather neutral day; in other words, I wasn’t particularly singing for joy but wasn’t deep in despair either.  At first, I attempted to ward off the “feelings” with a little humor because I just didn’t want to enter that dark room that contained words like sorrow, suffering, loneliness, forsaken, unloved, depressed…

But I did…and by the time bed time rolled around, my “feelings” were stirred to agitation not conducive to sleep.  I tossed and turned and tossed and turned until I felt strangled by my own gown, and tore it off.  And still I couldn’t find peace.  I counted backwards from 100 like the anesthetist had me do when I was put under a general anesthesia for the birth of my son (it had worked in the past).  I did finally fall asleep but I don’t recall what did the job or how long it took.

Sleep is a great way to resolve “feeling” issues because I woke with a fresh outlook.  I re-read a post from my friend’s Facebook page that didn’t meet the need the night before, but had a newness to it.  And I had a bigger faith for that which my friend is suffering.

For those of us who accept Christianity as our spiritual frame of reference, Christ is our Big Brother, our mentor, our example of HOW to approach the difficult times in our lives.  He embraced the events of the last week of His life with a deep faith and trust in the promises of God (Yahweh Rophe or any other name assigned to our Creator).  When words like pain and suffering, betrayal, abandonment, forsaken, unloved threaten our peace, we have only to look at His final days.

Jesus was sold out to His enemies for a measly 30 pieces of silver by one of the men He had handpicked to follow His ministry.  He was denied as an associate by one who had sat at table with Him just a few hours before.  When He asked His three closest friends to stay awake and unite with Him in prayer, given what He was facing, He repeated found them sleeping.

He was arrested alone…beaten to near death alone…forced to carry his own instrument of death alone…and then in His final hours hanging naked on a tree (the most humiliating death a Jew could imagine) to die, the ONLY people there were His mother, an ex prostitute, and His dearest friend, John.  And it would be the prostitute who would show her belief in His words, who would run to the tomb three days later while all the others huddled frightened for their own lives, to find the LORD risen!  But her words wouldn’t even be considered valid for inclusion in the Christian cannon…but that is another post for another day.

I AM reminded that though my life may feel like a favored coffee mug (or piece of crystal or family heirloom china) fallen and shattered on the floor, irreparable by man, my life is NEVER irreparable to God.  He created me the first time, and every time my life has taken a change in direction, He has been there to make it better than it was before.   He may not be able to put it back together as it was, but He will make a beautiful piece of art with the possibility of being tremendously more than it was.

So, when “feelings” threaten to overwhelm you with grief and sorrow and pain and suffering, a sense of abandonment and the belief that you are unloved, remember that you will NEVER experience what Jesus went through and He triumphed in His transformation.  You may feel like a pile of clay on the floor, useless and unlovely, but God in His immense creativity will recreate your life to be a beautiful piece of art for Him to admire.  Your life is destined to bring Him glory and He is vested in completing your task.

“God is at work in you to will and to work for His good pleasure…and He will accomplish what concerns you…sorrow may last for a night, but joy comes in the morning.”  Hold on, my sisters and brothers…hold on to the hands that stilled the water…

Where are those damn blueprints?

Have you ever felt like life was just a crap shoot, a grab bag, a white elephant gift exchange? Have you envied the lives of other people and what they have and the ease with which they seem to get the things they have? Sure you have! That’s why you (and I) watch “Oprah’s Favorite Things” or “Lives of the Rich and Famous”. (Is that show still on?). That’s why we tap our toes and sing along with songs like Katy Perry’s FIREWORK.

Do you ever feel
Like a plastic bag
Drifting through the wind
Wanting to start again
Do you ever feel
Feel so paper-thin
Like a house of cards
One blow from caving in
Do you ever feel
Already buried deep
Six feet under
Screams but no one seems to hear
a thing…

Well, I for one have grown way past “sick and tired” of being “sick and tired” of my life. Instead of continuing to find fault with these PPP’s (perpetually “perky” people), I began listening to some of them in order to discover the source of their blissfully happy and successful lives. I finally decided that there MUST be something incredibly unique about the way they approach life; something I was sorely missing.

I certainly couldn’t set out to meet and greet all these people and interview them to find our their “secrets”. In fact, I would be hard pressed to find and interview one person. But the Internet is a vast virtual universe of information, and a great deal of that information is completely FREE, lucky for me (remember, I am not living that blissfully successful life yet).

I think my quest started with a simple piece of junk email; the stuff that fills my email box to the brim every…single…day! Only, something CAUGHT my attention, and instead of treated it as junk and trashing it, I click on it. Then when I was directed to the website, I clicked on the video, and of all things…(gasp) I watched and listened, not with skepticism, cynicism, or judgment (this is all hooey!) but totally enthralled with what was being communicated.

Before any thing was a THING, it was a THOUGHT! Everything around you–the chair you sit on, the clothes you are wearing, even the walls that surround you, existed as a thought in someone’s mind before it was ever manufactured, sewn, or built. In Genesis, it is recorded that God “said” and it (whatever “it” was) was. God said, “Let there be light” and LIGHT existed. He did the same for the heavens, the earth, the seas, the creatures in the heavens, the earth, and the seas.

God created man in His image, with the same capacity to create. The people who seem to live the lives we all wish we could live recognize the power that exists in KNOWING this truth: that every thing begins as a thought. The vast majority of us do not recognize that power exists let alone that the power exists in each of us. What we think about, we bring about.

Henry Ford said, “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right!” He recognized that we have the power to create our own destiny. What we believe about our lives is what manifests in our lives. If you aren’t living the life you would LOVE to be living, consider what you are believing or what you are thinking about your life.

Do you know that there’s still a chance for you
Cause there’s a spark in you

You just gotta ignite the light
And let it shine
Just own the night
Like the Fourth of July

Before you existed, you were a thought in the Divine Mind of God. He had a vision of your life before you even breathed your first breath in the same way new parents have for a new child. The DNA of all that you are to be and do in this world already exists in you. YOU get to decide how you will express the glory of your Creator in this world, and He delights to see what you are going to create.

If you are not living the life that you sometimes catch yourself imagining living, then it would be my guess that somebody (or somebodies) has told you “you can’t do that…that won’t work…you don’t have what it takes to do that” and you have believed it. You have accepted as reality some limitation that someone else has spoken about your life. And even now, the voice in your own head mimics that voice like a parrot…”you can’t do that…that won’t work..you don’t have what it takes to do that…”

These are lies. These are the affirmations of the ego-self, not the true self; that part of you that KNOWS its connection to the Divine Creative Mind of God of which you are a part. You can do whatever you put your hands to do. The limit is your own imagination, your own thoughts. You remember “Build it and they will come!” Well, believe it, dream it, think it…and then build it!

The people that live that life you wish you could live believed there were no limits to what they could do and be or live. That is the only difference between them and you. They were not constrained or restricted by the naysaying. They believed and they held to what they believed until they had it in hand.

We use maps to find unknown destinations. We use outlines to rough out reports. An architect always starts with a design idea. A construction engineer wouldn’t dream of starting a building project without blueprints. Having a design, a plan, keeps you on track, and let’s those who are assisting in the process know where the project is headed.

Use your own thought processes to create or design the life you desire. You HAVE a life by default. Now try building one by DESIGN.

Cause baby you’re a firework
Come on show ‘em what you’re worth
Make ‘em go “Oh, oh, oh!”
As you shoot across the sky-y-y

Baby you’re a firework
Come on let your colors burst
Make ‘em go “Oh, oh, oh!”
You’re gunna leave ‘em fallin’ down-own-own

Desire, Ask, Expect, Receive

Do you find your feelings hurt when someone expresses doubt about your love for them or when they question your intentions? How much more does it hurt the heart of God when we doubt His love for us or question His intentions toward us?

We desire something and we don’t get it, so we proclaim in disappointment, “it just wasn’t God’s will.” We basically blame God–it’s God’s fault we don’t have what we desire. That is more often than not a misapplication of a truth, an excuse for lack of understanding of how the laws of the universe work. It is in that sense a “false” teaching perpetuated by a church unwilling to take responsibility for its outcomes. If you can’t explain why someone’s prayer wasn’t answered, you simply proclaim with God-like authority, “It was not God’s will.”

I wonder how often God’s response is “bullsh*t! Don’t throw that in my lap!” Jesus was pretty adamant about throwing the merchandisers out of the temple. So, I hope you don’t take offense that I believe in a God who has passionate responses to injustice, especially when directed at Himself.

We easily credit Him when things go our way, but disparage Him, or blame Him, or move into absolute despair as to why God didn’t show His favor upon us when things don’t go our way. We give in to the “belief” that if we didn’t get something we asked for, it automatically means what we asked for was not God’s will. Then we spiral into the black unknown as to what in the world God’s will is for us.

We go on pilgrimages. We drag ourselves into the emotional, mental, spiritual desert. We put on sack cloth and roll around in the ashes in order to discover the mythical, mysterious, magical will of God; the red center of the target; the bullseye. Well, maybe you don’t, but I sure did! Some of us eventually give up asking anything…better to not ask then to ask and be told “no” over and over again.

Scripture tells us that God is at work in us to will and to work for His good pleasure. But contrary to what the church has traditionally taught, our GOOD is God’s pleasure. God delights to bless us, to give us that which we desire and for which we hold expectation of receipt. Psalm 37 says,

“Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart…commit your way to Him and he will do it.”

So, let us get back to my first question. If it hurts you when someone you love expresses doubt about your love for them or fear of your intentions, how much more does it sadden your Heavenly Father when you fail to put your deepest desires into His hands by asking of Him? And then if you do ask, you then fail to set an expectation that He will give you that which you have asked of him? St. John said,

“Whatever we ask we receive from Him because we keep His commandments and do the things that are pleasing in His sight.” (1John3:22)

St. Mark said,

“Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” (Mark 11:24).

There is a deep connection between desire and expectation as it applies to the laws of the universe. One thing no one ever told me when I had questions as to why prayers were not answered was the connection between my asking and my actually expecting God to answer and to give what I had asked. I was often directed to the writings of Jesus’ brother, James, and what he has to say about unanswered prayer, that of asking with wrong motives:

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? You want something but don’t get it. You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures. (James 4:1-3—NIV)

Then I would be escorted by the Adversary (who, by the way, does not bring lamps to light your way) down the path of that dark search of my motives. That path would lead to all sorts of doubts about my self, my salvation, my relationship to God, my ability to hear the “right” voice, etc. I will have to write again about the relationship between the Adversary and the Ego; another time…another time.

You see, my dear friends, you wouldn’t ask for something if it wasn’t something you desired. And if you desire it, there must be some potential availability of what you desire. God is our source for everything under the sun. He is the one who longs to bless us, and like the line from the classic movie (and one of my all time favorites “Chariots of Fire”), God feels your pleasure when you run, when you draw, when you write, when you sing, when you play your guitar, when you tend to your flowers, when you sew, when you ski…do you get what I am saying. God takes pleasure in YOU!

But if you ask something of Him but you don’t believe He can deliver on your request, even St. James says you shouldn’t expect anything; you are like a ship tossed by the waves (of doubt). You must believe, you must expect God to answer. You must also approach God with an open hand, and allow Him to answer maybe in a way not exactly as you expect, but in a way that will be BETTER than you expect. Desire without expectation is simply wishful thinking, day dreaming, fantasy.

Let me give you an example. Let’s say you go to McDonald’s. You get up to the counter and you ask the clerk, “May I have some food, please?” You are polite. You are engaging. But the clerk looks back at you with that quizzical “huh?” look on his/her face. You ask a second time, “May I have some food, please?” This time the clerk asks you, “What would you like?” You repeat yourself a third time, “I would like some food?” Now the clerk is completely frustrated and calls for a manager.

This is what I suspect is the heavenly view of the vast majority of human prayers. This total lack of specifics is clogging up the pipeline of God’s being able to deliver upon your request. You have to come to Him knowing what it is you want Him to give or to do for you. We may have been taught that God knows our every thought, but believe me, at this time, He is NOT reading your mind to determine what you want. His expectation is that you ASK.

Ok, you finally get your food. You find a nice table. You sit down and begin to unwrap your food, and you find, horror of horrors, not the item you were wanting, but something you absolutely abhor. This is where expectation comes in. You paid for “x” but got “z”. Well, if you were not specific in your asking in the first place, why are you now so upset over not getting what you wanted? You are ready now to give that clerk a piece of your mind (and file a complaint with the manager too, and tell all your friends about the lousy service you received, and get all of them to boycott the place…)

Your expectations sparked a series of actions to bring about your desired results. Desire plus expectation will facilitate action to see that what one wants is received. Desire plus expectation will also allow us to wait patiently for the delivery of that which we expect to receive. When you order a package, it doesn’t matter how it is delivered, but there is an expectation that it will be delivered, eventually. If the delivery does not occur in what would be a reasonable expected time, that expectation will motivate you to take action, and you will make phone calls, check tracking information, do whatever is necessary to get what you ordered delivered.

When God’s children ask things of Him, He delights to give just as our earthly parents do. He delights in our excitement and pleasure at receiving those things we desire. You must ASK. Then you must believe or set an expectation of His answer. And your expectation will fuel your behavior as you wait for your answer. This is God’s natural laws in action. And this is what pleases Him!

I promise to hit on “right motives” another time.

I WAS BORN TO WALK WITH GOD

I was raised in church, was “forced” (maybe that is too harsh a word) to attend weekly services and education classes all my early years lived in my parent’s home.  Just days before leaving for college, I was asked to accompany friends to a revival sponsored by their church.  It was there that the message of the cross became REAL to me.  I prayed the “sinners” prayer and immediately felt as if “the hamster wheel” I had been on stopped and I could get off.  I was given my first bible, a King James addition and a booklet with one month of bible study lessons.

I left for college with not much understanding of what the expectations of my “salvation” experience was to be.  There were girls on my dorm floor that “claimed” to be Christians, and who took me occasionally to their churches (when they weren’t hung over from sneaking in booze or their boyfriends to their dorm rooms the night before).  With little to no understanding, I made the assumption that I was “saved” (i.e. destined for heaven with a “get out of jail free” card) but what I did with my life was strictly up to me.

Well, what red-blooded college coed wouldn’t say, “whoo hooo…let’s party hearty”?  Don’t get me wrong. I attended my classes regularly and I graduated with a Bachelor of Science Degree in Psychology and at least a 3.4 average.  I completed my GRE and was accepted to the Master’s Degree in Social Work program at another college.  But the weekends and the holidays, and my evenings were full of experimentation and curiosity about the world and its people all around me.  There just wasn’t much room for church or bible study past that first 30 days.

What the God of the Universe had begun, He was intent upon finishing.  Within months of moving to the city where I would attend graduate school, God would lead two young ladies to knock on my door.  I was interviewing potential roommates and opened the door expecting to find the next candidate.  I found something much more rewarding.

These ladies were part of a motley crew of believers in the life and message of Jesus of Nazareth.  We had a conversation that was more than uplifting.  It was energizing, faith-giving, inspirational, and purposeful.  Two days later, my sister would come for a visit fresh from her own spiritual awakening and would challenge me that God had greater expectations for my life than I was living.  I confessed my falling short, and believed that God Himself would direct my steps.

A week later, I got in my unairconditioned Pinto and drove to the location the two young ladies had given me.  This was WAY out of my comfort zone, but I was INSPIRED to go; the Spirit within was pulling me along to do something completely out of “character”.  I stayed for 4 years.  I did street ministry.  I did floor by floor, room by room ministry in the dorms.  I shared my faith at work.  I LIVED a joy I had not known before.

I learned to LOVE the scriptures, not only reading them but living them.  I saw it lived out in the people around me in a way I had not seen in organized churches.  It was like living what I was reading in the Book of Acts.  I grew in knowledge and understanding.  And I thought I was growing in the KNOWING of my God.

Thirty years, two children, and a divorce later, I began to doubt EVERYTHING I had come to believe.  The last 10 years of my life have been the biggest death-defying struggle.  It is as if God’s intention was to knock my Erector Set life down to the foundation and start afresh.  I would experience deaths, betrayals, and poverty like never before.  I would question every piece of scripture I had ever been taught to trust in.  Eventually I would pull away from every organization, every relationship, and even the church in which I had pledged membership.  I would choose to go into the desert.

I never abandoned God.  Nor did He ever abandon me.  I KNOW now that even when I couldn’t “feel” Him near, He was always as near as my next breath.  I can look back and recognize all the road signs He had put up along my way.  I could see every strategically placed lamp post, every carefully planned curve in the road.  It is KNOWING this that gives me courage to continue to press on.  The journey is not yet over…the fat lady hasn’t sung yet!

I WAS BORN TO WALK WITH GOD!

Those words stopped me in my reading.  I sat staring at the words on the page.  I kept repeating them over and over in my mind.  And quietly the weight began to roll off my shoulders.  You see, I had been searching for that DOT in the center of God’s will.  I had been trying to DO that which would win His approval but always came up feeling the lack.

Psalm 34:10

The young lions do lack and suffer hunger; But they who seek the LORD shall not be in want of any good thing.

There was nothing I had to do but walk with God.  Like the men on the Road of Emmaus, all I had to do was walk in the awareness that the LORD is with me, period!  Jesus said the answer was in ABIDING; in His word, in the branch…to abide is to take up residence.

If you have done all the religious activity and still feel a sense of emptiness…if you have questioned your faith and whether your work has amounted to anything…if you are ready to get off the hamster wheel of people pleasing and working and giving and attending with the hopes of finding peace and rest…you will want to read this book.

Steve McSwain gives a moving testimony of how God woke him up not while in church, not while engaged in bible study, not while being busy at some work of Christian charity, but while he sat on a Sunday afternoon on his couch flipping channels on the TV.  He will lead you through his journey of discover of the simplicity of KNOWING God’s will, and how doing comes out of the knowing and not the other way around.

There were times when I had to put the book down and give thought to what I was reading.  And there was the moment I MET my EGO face to face, and made a decision that I would die to death.  I faced my greatest fear–that of dying before I truly lived!

This book is NOT for the timid.  So, be forewarned!  Unless you have an open spirit to listen to truth in all its forms…  Unless you can embrace that God is always speaking and does so not only through your accepted form of communication, but through voices you may not have considered before, you may not want to take this one up.

But if you have questions about your purpose, or whether God is available to every man, woman, and child around the globe including those who have never heard the name of Jesus…if you question that souls are going to hell every minute for lack of the “message” going out to them…if you wonder if it is possible to live the life that Jesus promised, one of abundance, power, and daily miracles…or if you want to KNOW God as Enoch did…

Read THE ENOCH FACTOR by Steve McSwain.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/The-Enoch-Factor/Stephen-B-McSwain/e/9781573125567

We, the jury, find the defendent…

NOT GUILTY!

WHAT?

There is a lot of BUZZ about the Casey Anthony trial verdict and it is my guess the buzz will continue for some time in the media, in book deals, and “made-for-TV” movies.  The lawyers will get the spot light for a while before returning to their every day practices (unless they secure yet another “high profile” case which I am sure is the desire—power and fame do corrupt the best of intentions).  It is great fodder for conversation and it is much less personal than the national debt or health care or the presidential debates (OMG, it is way too early for those discussions).  So those discussing the situation can stay one step removed from it.

Well, the general public can stay one step removed but I wouldn’t want to be Cindy or George Anthony or Casey for that matter.  The “hounds of hell” in the form of the news media and mobs of angry, frustrated citizens will be watching their every move.  Frankly, I envision the same ghouls that hunted down the killer of Patrick Swayze’s character in the film “Ghost” haunting Casey into the depths of hell.  That’s my ego-self finding comfort in another man’s (woman’s) demise or torture.

I posted an emotional response to the outcome and it was quickly pointed out to me that the “law did what the law was supposed to do”.  The “letter of the law”, as spelled out in our legal system, says that “if it doesn’t fit, you must acquit”, or in other words, if the evidence leaves room for “reasonable doubt” as to the guilt of the accused, the jury must find the defendant “not guilty”.  It seems the Supreme Court ruled: (as copied from comment post on Facebook—Bill O’Reilly’s Talking Points Memo. Vile Casey Anthony Found Not Guilty. Watch: http://goo.gl/fc66)

“Reasonable doubt is required in criminal proceedings under the due process clause of the Fifth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution. In In re Winship, 397 U.S. 358, 90 S. Ct. 1068, 25 L. Ed. 2d 368 (1970), the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the highest standard of proof is grounded on “a fundamental value determination of our society that it is far worse to convict an innocent man than to let a guilty man go free.”

Really?  Do we really want a system that says we would rather let a guilty man go free than convict an innocent man?  Is not the goal of our court system to discover the TRUTH, the whole ugly truth? I wonder what would have happened had Pontius Pilate, the prefect (governor) of Judea used such “evolved” legal thinking!  But then he didn’t find Jesus guilty of any crimes against Rome.  Neither did Herod Antipas, the tetrarch of Galilee.  Both men “washed their hands” of the matter and were ready and willing to let this “accused” man go free.

Jesus was innocent of all crimes for which he was accused.  He had never claimed to be greater than Caesar.  He had never murdered anyone.  In fact, he had raised several people from the dead, healed the sick and dying, gave sight to the blind, fed thousands, and gave the leftovers back to the boy from whom he borrowed the lunch basket.  Frankly, he deserved a “Good Citizen” Award.  But it was the mob of angry, agitated Jewish citizens fanned to a frenzy by the Jewish leadership that screamed “crucify him”.  (I am not making an argument for the Jews killing Jesus, so don’t go on that rabbit trail).

This of course is the opposite of what we are witnessing in the Casey Anthony verdict.  A jury of her “peers” finds her “not guilty” of the crimes of murder in the first degree (premeditated), aggravated manslaughter, and aggravated child abuse.  But the people are screaming, FOUL!  I have a problem in this case of letting the guilty go.  I find this case to be a twisting of the law and a miscarriage of justice.  When the law simply becomes a tool by which a defense attorney can secure an acquittal of his client, the is something wrong and in my opinion, the system is “broken”—

–adjective

•  reduced to fragments; fragmented.
• ruptured; torn; fractured.
• not functioning properly; out of working order.
• Meteorology . (of sky cover) being more than half, but not totally, covered by clouds.
• changing direction abruptly
• fragmentary or incomplete.
• infringed or violated.
• interrupted, disrupted, or disconnected.
• weakened in strength, spirit, etc.
• tamed, trained, or reduced to submission.
• imperfectly spoken, as language.
• spoken in a halting or fragmentary manner, as under emotional strain.
• disunited or divided.
• not smooth; rough or irregular.
• ruined; bankrupt.

The system is not functioning properly if I am not allowed to consider the emotional state of the accused but only the physical evidence discovered in the investigation of the case.  The jury did what the jury was instructed to do; consider the evidence and come to a conclusion as to the charges of murder in the first degree, aggravated manslaughter, and aggravated child abuse.  Ok, I get the evidence not proving the first degree charge.  There was no physical evidence unequivocally linking the Casey to Callie’s death; no DNA, no finger prints, etc.

Beyond reasonable doubt

• This is the highest standard used as the burden of proof in Anglo-American jurisprudence and typically only applies in criminal proceedings.
• It has been described as, in negative terms, as a proof having been met if there is no plausible reason to believe otherwise.
• If there is a real doubt, based upon reason and common sense after careful and impartial consideration of all the evidence, or lack of evidence, in a case, then the level of proof has not been met.
• Proof beyond a reasonable doubt, therefore, is proof of such a convincing character that you would be willing to rely and act upon it without hesitation in the most important of your own affairs. However, it does not mean an absolute certainty. The standard that must be met by the prosecution’s evidence in a criminal prosecution is that no other logical explanation can be derived from the facts except that the defendant committed the crime, thereby overcoming the presumption that a person is innocent until proven guilty.
• If the trier of fact has no doubt as to the defendant’s guilt, or if their only doubts are unreasonable doubts, then the prosecutor has proven the defendant’s guilt beyond a reasonable doubt and the defendant should be pronounced guilty.
• The term connotes that evidence establishes a particular point to a moral certainty and that it is beyond dispute that any reasonable alternative is possible. It does not mean that no doubt exists as to the accused’s guilt, but only that no Reasonable Doubt is possible from the evidence presented.
• The main reason that the high proof standard of reasonable doubt is used in criminal trials is that such proceedings can result in the deprivation of a defendant’s liberty or even in his or her death. These outcomes are far more severe than in civil trials, in which money damages are the common remedy.

But we have the second charge of aggravated manslaughter.  Manslaughter is different from murder in regard to “intent”—there is no intent to kill but the result is still death.  Ms. Anthony was accused of “aggravated” manslaughter.  Aggravation as per the law is any circumstance attending the commission of a crime that increases its guilt or enormity or adds to its injurious consequences.  So, this charge “ass-u-me-s” there was no intent; the death was accidental or at least there was no premeditation.  The aggravated part must be the use of duck tape and the efforts to dispose of or cover up the evidence of the crime (laundry bags, black plastic trash bags, shovels, chloroform)…Ya think!

So now we get to the third charge of aggravated child abuse!  It is my guess here that being there is no recorded history as per records with the police, physicians, or hospitals of apparent abuse, this is why the jury would find “not guilty” on this charge.  This brings me to question the motives of the Office of the District Attorney and the team of prosecutors’ decision to pursue these particular charges.

Maybe I am not seeing the clear picture here, but it seems the decision was made over time, given Casey Anthony’s bazaar behavior during those 31 days before she even reported her daughter missing and her continued bazaar behavior up until the body was finally discovered, that she was guilty.  Another decision was made to pursue the harshest consequence, the death penalty.  The team was so intent on “crucifying” the woman for her “believed” actions toward her daughter that they chose to pursue those indictments that would bring the harshest consequences rather than pursuing those indictments that could actually be proved in a court of law based on the evidence at hand, and thus hold Ms. Anthony accountable for her daughter’s death.  The indictments assumed premeditated murder with the death penalty “on the table” as the outcome of conviction.  Or so it seems.

Any way you slice this case, it comes up for me as a miscarriage of justice.  Just because there was not sufficient hard core, documented, scientifically sound evidence to convict this woman of getting rid of her emotionally burdensome child does not mean this woman was not 1) an unfit mother, 2) a social reprobate, 3) a pathological liar, 4) and a narcissist.  I can only hope that this case results in more clarification of laws governing the collection of evidence, the attendance to details of a case, the careful consideration of conviction verses going for the harshest consequences of a crime instead of the continued manipulation of the law in order to get a defendant off.

When we become a nation of people with so little regard for the preciousness of life, and a child can be snuffed out by a parent (or a guardian, or a relative, or even a stranger) with no consequences; when we can “kill” thousands upon thousands of babies not because of rape or incest but simply because it’s inconvenient, we have bigger problems than our manipulation of the law to get the desired result rather than to pursue the truth.  Maybe the biggest problem is our broken  moral compass!

WWJD?

Years ago the kids were all into the WWJD bracelets.  You could buy the grosgrain ribbon ones for a dollar at the Christian book stores or craft centers like Hobby Lobby.  My daughter and I collected almost all the colors available (to coordinate with our outfits).  You could get them in sterling silver and even gold.  They fell out of fashion over time, but does the sentiment not still live on?  I certainly hope so!

“What would Jesus do?” should be the question anyone who says they believe in Him and His teachings asks when facing a situation that does not present an obvious solution.  I’ve asked myself that question more than once or twice.  So, I have a situation, and I would like some feedback on what YOU (the Collective You) would do…

I was just notified by a friend on Facebook that she is facing eviction if she does not come up with $500 by tomorrow morning.  She didn’t get into this situation over night, that is a given.  But how does she deal with it today? I don’t know all the events that took place to lead her to where she finds herself in panic mode now, and I have no idea HOW God intends to proceed.  The Buddha says that we bring the vast majority of our suffering upon ourselves.  And it is true, we dig ourselves into our own holes, and then we “cry out to God” to save us, to fix it.  And you know what… He does!

But what would you do…what would you say to this person who finds herself on the verge of eviction?

Jesus told the crowds that afternoon on the side of the mountain not to worry themselves with what they eat or what we wear; that the birds of the air and the flowers of the fields don’t concern themselves with such things. They KNOW that God provides for them.  We are more important to God than birds and flowers.  But HOW do we walk out that knowledge in the midst of eviction notices and cut off notices and …other life crises?

If I had the money, I would hope that I would give it.  The saints of the time of the Book of Acts held all things in common; were selling their goods to meet the needs of others, and God was blessing them.  We open our wallets for the collection plates at church even when we don’t know how that money is being used, and like the government (a whole different post), most of it is used to pay mortgages, utilities, salaries, etc, and very little actually gets to the poor and needy, the widow and the orphan.  And God said that is where PURE religion lies, in the caring for widows and orphans.  Jesus said, “What you do for the least of these, you do for Me.”

The Apostle Paul wrote to the Philippians,

“Be anxious for NOTHING, but by prayer and supplication (a humble entreaty or petition) make your requests KNOWN to God, and the peace of Christ which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”  

Of course, the bolding and the capitalization of words is mine, but I put the emphasis where I think it needs to be.  The see the subsequent lessons in these words as:

1.    Anxiety is a powerful emotion but unless what we fear is legitimate (you are walking down a beautiful hiking trail and as you turn a corner you find a bear staring you in the face), it can be destructive, resulting in high blood pressure, migraine headaches, stomach ulcers, and all manner of negative effects.  Fear will block those avenues that lead you to solutions.

 
2.    God expects us to respond in FAITH not fear to any given situation.  This is a command not a suggestion that we not be anxious. Our ego/flesh wants to give in to the flow to fear.  It’s the wide road that leads to destruction. But we must train our minds to live in faith.  Like a long distance runner trains to run a marathon, so we must train our minds to think upon the truth, upon faith, upon what Paul expressed in the rest of the above passage to the Philippians.

“Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise,dwell on these things.  The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.”

3.    Transforming our mind isn’t easy.  It is work.  And we have a choice.  It was said to Joshua, “Choose whom this day you will serve…”  Will you choose to serve the Ego-self/flesh or will you choose to serve the Divine Will of God, His Law, His purposes?  Do we trust Him and His promise for provision, or do we put more trust in our physical surroundings, the situation?  Is God not bigger than any circumstance?

 

4.    We are then admonished to not only pray but to make humble entreaty or petition in regard to our needs.  We must be willing to speak the unspeakable, to voice our needs to God.  Do we really think we can fool God?  He knew us while we were yet in our mother’s wombs.  He knows everything about us already, including what ever circumstance in which we find ourselves having to petition Him.  He knows how we got there, and He knows the way of escape.  Jesus said, “In the world you will have trouble, but be of good courage, I have overcome the world.”

 
5.    God isn’t TOO busy to hear from any of us.  He waits for each of us to acknowledge He is even there, let alone to listen to what He might have to say.  He also knows our human condition.  Jesus lived our human experience.  God knows what the limitations are to being human.  He also knows what it is to live above our human condition as the truly spiritual beings we are.  He knows everything about us anyway.  Why try to keep your situations “a secret” from God.

 
6.    We recite the prayer, “Our Father, who are in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name.  Thy Kingdom come.  Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.  GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD…”  We are to ask for and then trust that God’s intention is to bless us with what we NEED each day, not necessarily what we want each day.

 
7.    The result of this kind of faith exercise is PEACE; a peace that surpasses all our understanding.  It is the same kind of peace that ruled Jesus’ life.  It is a peace that stands guard in our hearts and minds against those things which produce anxiety.

 
I shared these things with this friend, and I certainly didn’t intend for it to sound like platitudes in the midst of her difficulty.  I am not in a position to give her the money she needs.  I am willing to stand with her (where two or more are gathered, there I AM in the midst of them) and believe with (and for) her answers.  I admonished her to “hold to the unchanging hands” of God and to look for His answers (and not pass them up as the man who asked God to rescue him and then let the rowboat, the speedboat, and the helicopter pass by while believing in God’s rescue).  I encouraged her to hold to the possibility that things were not as bad as they seemed and that if she waiting in joyful anticipation, she would see the blessing of the situation.

 

But none of that put $500 in her hands.

It isn’t always about YOU!

I watched a rebroadcast of the interview between Oprah and Sarah Ferguson, Duchess of York (and from here on referred to as Fergie) and I found myself totally identifying with Fergie.  She has spent most of her life being what other people expected her to be to the point where she is still struggling to be strong in her own identity. What really got my attention in the interview was when Fergie was relating a particularly low point in her life, after Oprah has extended her hand of friendship, when she went into a panic.

It seems she sent Oprah an email expressing her feelings and when Oprah failed to respond in what Fergie considered a more than reasonable amount of time, Fergie ASS-U-ME-D that something was wrong.  She began questioning her friendship, questioning what in the world she had done to offend Oprah, or what she had simply done wrong.  It seems she sent another (or maybe a series of other emails) expressing her consternation, frustration, angst about not getting a response.  Oprah’s response: “It isn’t always about YOU!  Get over it!  I have a life.  I have things to do.  I am not always available on YOUR time table.”   Now those are not her exact words, but you get the point.

Feelings are REAL but they are not always ACCURATE!  Oprah’s response on the show when relating the incident was probably harsher than it was in real time, at least that is what I would hope (and expect) from Oprah.  Fergie’s lack of confidence in herself was the filter through which she was making a judgment about Oprah’s slow response.  It never occurred to Fergie that Oprah might be busy “saving the world” (a bit of a dig that I heard but maybe everyone didn’t catch).  Fergie’s “glasses” were a bit smudged (“We see through the glass dimly”–I Corinthians)!

What is the message to me, having been where Fergie was a few times–just because someone doesn’t respond to you in your moment of need, doesn’t mean you have done something wrong, or you have offended them, or they have written you off.  It may simply be, they are BUSY and you need to CHILL OUT.  It isn’t always about YOU!.

And as I was thinking about that episode and the implications in my own life, I got the following inspiration thought from Mary Morrissey’s DREAM BUILDERS blog:

I once noticed a sign on a little tiny gas station way out in Montana and it said this: Remember it isn’t your position in life, it’s your disposition that determines your happiness.

What a great thing to remember.  It isn’t our position, the things we have or the names that we have.  Today, whatever tries to gain our attention –if only this or that would happen; if only this hadn’t happened or if only this could happen then I’ll be happy –it isn’t the position, it’s our disposition that determines our happiness.

Today is the day to be happy.

The Duchess of York, Ms. Sarah Ferguson, is certainly living the truth that position has absolutely nothing to do with happiness.  She has had to live a very public transformation, and much of the trouble she has experienced has been of her own creation.  We do things in desperation that we would never do in confidence.  She is learning to set her disposition.  She is learning to lean on her friends for help, and she is putting into practice what she is learning.

I wish her the best in the way that I desire my own best expression of life.  We are sisters in our struggle against people-pleasing and learning to walk in our own path, speaking our own words, living our own truth.  I wish you well, Fergie because sometimes it is about YOU!

FREEDOM!

When I see this word, I hear in my mind the shout of Mel Gibson, playing William Wallace, in the movie “Braveheart”.  He has been betrayed into the hands of the English by  a fellow Scotsman, Robert the Bruce (only in the movie–in reality, he was betrayed by another knight loyal to King Edward named John de Menteith).  He is given two choices–die a merciful death by renouncing his rebellion and declaring his allegiance to England or die a horribly painful death by insisting upon his crusade for freedom for Scotland, Ireland, and all the clans ruled by England. (Can I have a third choice?)

William Wallace chooses a horrible death rather than dishonor his clan and his fellow countryman and all their efforts to live  free of English dominance. Of course, “Braveheart”  is a movie, and plenty of creative license is given to make a point.  But in truth,  Wallace did choose death because he refused to declare loyalty to the English King.

FREEDOM is always worth the fight, even to the death.

Today, Christians remember one Man willing to die an undeserved death for the sake of his “countryman”.  Jesus KNEW his calling.  When attending a wedding with his mother, he is asked to perform a miracle (turn water into wine) and he pleads with his mother:

On the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there; and both Jesus and His disciples were invited to the wedding.  When the wine ran out, the mother of Jesus said to Him, “They have no more wine.” And Jesus said to her, “Woman, what does that have to do with us? My hour has not yet come.” –John2:1-6

Jesus KNEW performing this miracle would start Him down a path from which there would be no turning back.  That path would come to an end roughly three years later on what Christian’s remember as Good Friday, the day He was nailed to a cross to “hang until He was dead”–his sentence for his so-called crimes.  And His last words would be:

Therefore when Jesus had received the sour wine, He said, “It is finished !” And He bowed His head and gave up His spirit. –John 19:30

The Apostle Paul would later address one reason why Jesus would willingly go to His death for crimes He had not committed.  In his letter to the Galatians, he writes:

Galatians 5:1

It was for freedom that Christ set us free ; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery.

The issue of circumcision had come up among the new believers in Galatia.  These newbies were being told by some of the old guard they needed to be circumcised in order to be right with God; faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus was not enough.  Paul admonished the Galatians saying they had been “running the race well” and that they need not be unsettled in their faith by these lies.  They had been set free from the LAW (of sin and death), and Paul questioned them as to why they would allow themselves to be subject again to that from which they had been set free.

• “The sting of death is sin and the power of sin is the law.”–I Corinthians 15:56
• “For the law of the Spirit of life in Jesus Christ has set you free from the law of sin and death.”–Romans 8:2
• “So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, ” If you continue in My word, then you are truly disciples of Mine, and you will know the truth, and the truth, and the truth will make you free.” They answer Him, “We are Abraham’s descendants and have never yet been enslaved to anyone (how soon we forget…the exodus from Egypt)’; how is it you say, ‘You will become free’?”.  Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is slave to sin.  The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son does remain forever. So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed.”–John 8:31-36

Slavery is a system under which people are treated as property (owned or entrapped by another) and are forced to work.   Slaves can be held against their will from the time of their capture, purchase or birth, and deprived of the right to leave, to refuse to work, or to demand compensation.–Wikipedia.

What is this “yoke of slavery” that Paul speaks of?  In the case of the story of William Wallace and the Scottish fight for independence from England, it is as simple as what was true during the Revolutionary War–freedom from subjection to another power.  Scotland wanted its sovereignty, the right to decide its own destiny as a country, just as the colonies of the new America wanted the same freedom to decide their own destiny.

Bigger than the freedom of countries to be self-ruled is the freedom as human beings to decide our own destinies and to not be slaves to other men or slaves to their own passions and lusts in life. 

For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, ” Abba! Father!”–Romans 8:15

Someone has fought and died for my physical freedom and Someone died an undeserved death for my spiritual freedom.  What am I willing to do to keep my freedom?  I am willing to give up anyone and anything that threatens my freedom to decide the course of my own life.  I am working hard to rid my life of those beliefs, thoughts, and leading actions that threaten my freedom.  I am  admonished in the scriptures to put away those “sins” (practices) to which I was once enslaved and to act as free woman.

Do not let anyone or anything hold you against your will.  Do not let anyone or anything enslave you to a life you do not wish to live.  Do not let anyone deprive you of your right to choose what is true for your life and how you will live it.  Do not let anyone keep you from accepting that which you purpose to accept or to refuse that which you purpose to refuse.

Blood was shed for your freedom.  Show your gratitude by living a life worthy of that freedom.  Honor those deaths by standing firm for your freedom to BE, to DO, to LIVE as God Himself created you to be, do, and live.

“The faith that you have, have as your own conviction before God.”–Romans 14:22

He is ALIVE and you are FREE!